As I sat down this morning (Happy Thanksgiving everyone!) and started to get organized to write today's blog post, I made a startling discovery. I was at a loss on how to categorize all the things I have learned over the years. I have learned problem-solving skills, ways to shift a paradigm (more on that later), distraction techniques, self-soothing techniques, how to accept the seemingly unacceptable and some fantastic relaxation skills. What I have not learned in my studies is how to write an orderly blog! So I started thinking about ways to organize myself.
Once upon a time, I read a great article by Karen Hall PhD called "No Matter What the Problem, There are Only Four Things You Can Do." She goes on to identify those things from a DBT (Dialectical Behavior Therapy) standpoint. It's a great article. I use it in session frequently; However, I didn't feel like I was able to break all that I know down into those four categories. So I widened my organization system a bit to include other things that made sense in my head. I came up with five categories. As such, the overarching categories I will cover are Solving the Problem, Shifting your Paradigm, Distraction Skills, Acceptance Skills, and Relaxation/Distress Tolerance Skills. I don't plan on having any precise pattern for how these things are covered and I will probably jump around depending on feedback I get from my readers and how I feel when I write my blog.
If there is something you are interested in learning that I do not cover, please email me at recoveryworkscounseling@gmail.com and let me know. I want this blog to be helpful and meaningful to my readers, so I want your input! Also, I believe privacy is extremely important so I promise to not share your name in the blog I write that answers your question. Please feel free to share your ideas for healthy skills you have used in the past in the comments section.
So let's get started with one of my favorite strategies because of its simplicity; Breathing. You do it, I do it, my cats do it, but did you know you can do it purposefully to manage your stress?
There are tons and tons of ways to use breathing to manage stress and anxiety. I will share with you the most basic technique I teach all my clients for using this skill. You can always add things to it, so think of this like the foundation of a house you are building.
First - find a comfortable, quiet, place to sit or lie down where you will not be interrupted. That means no phone, no TV, no interruptions of any kind for at least 15 minutes. Now, once you are settled, adjust your clothing to make sure you are comfortable. If you want to, light some incense or a scented candle or put on some soothing instrumental music. This is not necessary, but it can make it more relaxing. You may also want to set some kind of timer (with a soothing sound, not a jarring buzz or ring) so you know exactly how much time you have to deeply relax.
Next - take a large, slow, deep breath in through your nose. Then, gently and slowly release that large breath out through your mouth. After a slight pause, repeat this deep slow breath in through your nose and out through your mouth. Continue this pattern for about 5-10 minutes, being careful to make sure your in breath and your out breath are about the same length, otherwise you may start to feel dizzy and weird. As you take additional breaths, progressively and purposefully slow your breathing as you go. Remember to continue to take nice, deep breaths. Once your time has ended, allow yourself to slowly reorient to the room you are in and re-engage peacefully in your day.
Because of its simplicity, you can use this technique wherever you are in the world. You take your breathing with you everywhere. So you can do this on the bus, at work or any other time when you have a moment. Please be careful not to do this when you are driving a car or doing some other taks that needs your attentive awareness.
If you have any questions about this technique or if you would like to meet with me for a private session, please feel free to call me at 330-451-6306 email me at recoveryworkscounseling@gmail.com or visit the website at www.recoveryworksllc.net for more information on what insurances I take, etc. All sessions with me are by appointment only. If you are in crisis, please contact the Crisis Center at 330-452-6000. You may also go to any emergency department for assistance.
Have a wonderful & peaceful day!
Sincerely,
Trisha L beck LPCC-S
